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A man with a dry sense of humor who was at one point in his life, a social outcast, driven into a deep depression, and is slowly overcoming this problem by being an academic counselor who tells extremely lame jokes while putting one hand in his left pocket, thrusting his hips to the right, and shooting the "double-finger gun" at a 45º angle towards the ground.
Can usually be found wearing a button-up shirt with a collage of ducks and dogs scattered on it. He also wears an ugly pair of forest-green khakis slacks. His facial features include enormous ears, large, pointy, and crooked nose, and a clean-shaven face.
Name: Ned
Height: 6'5"
Weight: 135 lbs
Shoe Size: > 16
Ethnicity: Caucasian
Body Type: Lanky
Location: School Classroom
Occupation: Academic Advisor/Counselor
Habits: 1. Thrusting the symbol "The Ned" high in the air. 2. Repeating the main subject of every sentence you say to him while engaged in coversation.
Example 1:
Kids: "Ned, we are thinking about jobbing out of 6th and 7th hour, now that football is over."
Ned: "Jaaawwbbin' out"
Example 2:
Kids: Ned, we are thinking about getting into some serious supersadomasochisticnecrobeastiality.
Ned: "Supersadomasochisticnecrobeastiality."
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A Scottish term for a "Chav". It stands for Non-Educated-Delinquant.
Neds can be identified in 5 simple ways:
1-Scottish, white, working class.
2- Wears baseball caps, bling and minging tracksuits.
3- Lacks the ability to use standard English.
4- Listens to "hardcore" dance music, and drives around in an ugly little car blaring their "toons" for all to hear.
5- Has an absolute obsession with the tonic wine- Buckfast.
Norm: Hi.
Ned: Haw, man, pass the pure mad Bucky man. Watch ye dinnae spill it, you'll wreck ma minted Adidas tracksuit man. Fancy a drive? We can go cruuuuuuizin' in ma pure mad mental Honda man, an' listen tae Basshunter man.
Norm: Fuck off, you wee ned!
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NEDS stands for New England Disease. This is a disease manifested by flabbiness, cellulite and pallid skin due to being stuck indoors and on the couch during the long winter months along the northern Atlantic seaboard. Women emerging in the first hot days of spring wearing shorts (and men) display the unfortunate and unsightly symptoms of NEDS. See also PNWD, (Pacific Northwest Disease).
Wow that girl's white flabby legs bespeak of a bad case of NEDS and whatnot.
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Anybody who wears Burberry, drinks "Buckie" and hangs about randomly on street corners of a night with their shell-suit bottoms tucked into their socks. Stands for Non Educated Delinquent. Also, sticks up middle finger at any nearby camera in a vain attempt to look like a "hard man". The female version sports sovereign rings on every finger and is commonly referred to as a "Senga".
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