Near hack experience

A play on words relating to near death experience.

The feeling you get when you enter in your username and password into something important (Facebook, bank websites, e-mail, video games you've invested years of time into) only to find that your password doesn't work.

This often leads to a sinking feeling in your chest which quickly leads to increased heart rate and paranoia, and everything that is at stake flashes before your eyes like your money, private messages, or that +9 GTB Thorny Shield you spent years camping for.

Though typically, you haven't actually been "hacked", but really:

1. You have caps lock on, and your password is case-sensitive.

2. You typed the right password in right too fast, and somehow managed to fuck up three, four, or even five times. (See: failure)

3. After making sure you type each letter firmly and individually, you quickly realize that you:

A) Entered in the wrong username that looks similar (Johndoe696996 instead of Johndoe696969)

B) You changed your password, and you forgot you ever changed it.

If none of these are the case, then you have either been keylogged (Again, see: failure), or you have violated the Terms of Service and have been banned.

Dude, I just had a near hack experience after failing to login to my main World of Warcraft account four times in a row.

It turns out I had my caps lock on the whole time.

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near sex experience

When a virgin got his/her partner's pants off but you couldn't make it to the sex because of some unfortunate event like erectile disfunction or the girls menstrual cycle or some emergency at work or home.

Alan have you even had sex? Alan: No but i've had a near sex experience.

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Near COVID experience

When you escape infection, because you missed a meeting with a person, that turned out to be infected.

"Hey babe, remember when you wanted to come over, but decided stay home?"
"Yeah, your roommate tested positive next day."
"That's what I call a near COVID experience."

Near Snuffkin Experience

When one performs the act of Blumpkin, nearly dies, has to be resuscitated and survives, living to tell the tale.

Granddad: Hey did I ever tell you kids about my Near Snuffkin Experience?

Grandchild: No, please do go on.

mello x near

Aka A TERRIBLE SHIP‼️‼️🤢🤢👿😐
anyways follow my tiktok nateswagriver 👩 ❤️ 💋 👩👩 ❤️ 💋 👩🧏🏻 ♀️

a ship that should never exist is mello x near

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Near-Crotch Experience

The instance where your face comes dangerously close to contact with a person's junk. It may be clothed, or unclothed, but either way, it is still potentially scarring.

Guy 1: "Dude, did I tell you about my near-crotch experience?"

Guy 2: "No!"
Guy 1: "It was pretty legit."

Girl 1: "Oh my god, I just had a near-crotch experience."

Girl 2: "OH MU GOD. With who?"

Girls 1: "That guy from my class."

Girl 2: "Oh, that's okay then. He's a BAMF."

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near death experience

a vibe check from god

Bro 1: I almost drowned under a floaty yesterday lmao
Bro 2: bruh you had a near death experience
Bro 3: vibe check from god!!

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