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Some guy who went postal on the ass of the town of Paradise. He was then taeken to Hell and ræpd by Satan. He then saw Cassandra Lynn's tits, but he then was blinded by Satan. TPD then kild satan and left hell. he then saw cassandra lynn (again) then was killed by Satan!!! He then woak up and ate Satan's massive cock.
TPD: What?
Satan: HAHAHAHA, The Postal Dood!
....
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The credits, often shrunk to the size of a postage stamp, that you try to catch at the end of a movie or film when it's shown on TV. Often interrupted by music that doesn't even belong to such a motion picture.
I wanted to see where this film was produced but the commercial came on and the credits became postal text.
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Someone who can't stop posting on Facebook.
Dude, I've posted like 5 times today on Facebook, I think I'm going Postal.
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When you cum on an envelope seal, let it dry, and then someone licks it.
Frank got me with the Angry Postal Worker again!
This is possibley the worlds most complicated sexual position ever invented. Requires 3 men a dog and a female amputee, all must be very flexible and missing most ribs. You will also need a pineapple, six feet of extension chord, a potato and a sharp pencil. This move needs a constant balance central fugle operator to keep everything in check. Firstly, one man balances his anus on a pencil, with his feet behind his neck. Then the dog balances on his erect penis and licks his nipples. The next man lays on his head, with his balls within easy licking reach. Then the amputee balances on her single leg, wraps herself in extension chord, puts a potato in her arse, rubs a pineapple on her clit and urinates on the pile. Job done. If all goes well, the big pile should resemble a postman with his hat.
A : Wow look at that, they're doin the unnaquainted postal worker.
B : Ooo i want some of that, gimme that pineapple.
A : That's fucked up, you need help.
B : It helps me sleep.
A : You sick fuck. Don't talk to me.
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"Postal 3 is better than Postal 4" is a phrase said by certain Postal fans who prefer a game that will never be fixed is better than a game that is getting more updates that add content and fixes. Postal 3 has been modded by fans but the base game remains the same.
Nerd: Postal 3 is better than Postal 4. Postal 4 sucks ass from a straw. Oh my god, what were they thinking? Running with Scissors is finally among the game developer studios I'm no more looking up to. No regrets my ass.
Chad: Calm down, they will hopefully fix it. You are a Postal 3 fanboy.
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The Postal Dude : Hey I'm just trying to exercise my second-amendment rights here ya fuckin' Communist!
The Postal Dude : I suppose it would have been more politically correct to kill the women and the minorities first.
The Postal Guy : Buttsauce!
The Postal Dude : Bless me, father, for I have sinned. No, really! I'm not kidding here! *Big* sinner. Yup!
The Postal Dude : The gene pool is stagnant and I am administering chlorine.
The Postal Dude : Please don't think I'm a bigot, I kill races equally...
The Postal Dude : after finding that it's the apocalypse in the newspaper Hmm... Normally, I'd expect a fancy cinematic to explain such a crucial story element. The font is nice, though.
The Postal Dude : I was pretty hungover yesterday, but I think I remember where I work.
The Postal Dude : I regret nothing.
The Postal Dude : Only my weapon understands me.
The Postal Dude : You probably thought you weren't gonna die today? Surprise!
The Postal Dude : Guns don't kill people, I do!
The Postal Dude : at the end of the game Honey, you won't believe the day I've had!
Postal Dude's Wife : Did you remember my Rocky Road?
The Postal Dude : D'oh!
gunshot
The Postal Dude : Urinating quote 1 That's the ticket!
The Postal Dude : Urinating Quote 3 Now the flowers will grow.
The Postal Dude : Entering Lucky Ganesh All-American grocery store Did somebody slaughter a goat in here? Seriously, I wanna know.
Me: The Postal Dude : Hey I'm just trying to exercise my second-amendment rights here ya fuckin' Communist!
The Postal Dude : I suppose it would have been more politically correct to kill the women and the minorities first.
The Postal Dude : That one's 'cause I can!
The Postal Dude : Bless me, father, for I have sinned. No, really! I'm not kidding here! *Big* sinner. Yup!
The Postal Dude : I know what you're thinking, but the funny thing is, I don't even LIKE videogames...
The Postal Dude : The gene pool is stagnant and I am administering chlorine.
The Postal Dude : Please don't think I'm a bigot, I kill races equally...
The Postal Dude : after shooting someone while you're dressed as a cop Someone stole my donuts, and now you're all gonna pay!
The Postal Dude : Ow, right in the stuff.
Last lines
The Postal Dude : Doh!
The Postal Guy : Thing is, I don't even like video games.
The Postal Dude : after smoking some catnip Yeah baby, I AM the lizard king!
The Postal Dude : Yeah yeah, blah blah -- don't you have minorities to oppress?
The Postal Dude : after smoking crack pipe This can't be good for me, but I feel great!
The Postal Dude : Urinating Quote 2 Oh-ho-ho-hohhh, yyyy--EAAHH.
The Postal Dude : after being rebuffed You gotta be fucking KIDDING!
The Postal Dude : Ohhh, my nads!
My Friend: Nice But Im dying
Me: Buttsause
My Friend: Pog
Me: The Postal 2 Dude
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