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Steve came over to help me build the deck, but he's about as useful as an arse full of roasted snow.
22👍 4👎
Sitting in front of a fire and receiving oral sex while eating reduced fat wheat thins.
My girlfriend got crumbs in her hair when she gave me that diet Ohio hog roast.
14👍 2👎
The act of farting under the covers, then getting out of bed, waking your girlfriend, and turning on the light. The sudden bright light in the middle of the night forces the the victim to pull the covers over their own head, exposing them to the foul, putrid odor left there by your ass. Causing them to "self roast" in a cloud airborn anal leakage
My girlfriend wouldnt swallow my cock last night, so I introduced her to the Self Roasting Dutch Oven
77👍 23👎
Man I'm hung over today because of all those roast beef sammiches I had lastnight.(nm)
2👍 6👎
the large flapping, beefy scrotum like skin sometimes covered in a film of what would appear to be chedder sauce caused by hygene negligence.
Mary Jane rotten crotch: Omg im so sorry about my roast beef and chedder cunt last night.
dingle berry johnson: Oh thats ok, i dont mind a little flavour.
9👍 1👎
On November your gonna be able to roast your teachers and professors get ready
Student: Omg it's finally Roast your teacher month
Teacher: This month is gonna be bad for me
8👍 1👎
When your teenage son leaves a huge above-waterline shit in the toilet and doesn't flush it because he knows it wont go down. Instead, he closes the door and leaves it for you to find.
Fucking Andrew left me a dutch oven pot roast before he left for school.