Random
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Random
Fake white boy rapping about drugs and shooting guns which he will never do any of these things.
Slim Jesus is a fake white boy.
131👍 38👎
Ben is feeling really rather swish in his sandals, his feet are free to enjoy the Summer air whilst still being protected AND they allow him to wear 3/4 shorts without looking quite the fool.
Or so he thinks...
Friends: 'GAHAHA! WHAT'S WITH THE JESUS CREEPERS, MAN?!'
Chris is embarrassed.
40👍 9👎
people who would rather put a symbol of modern christianity on their cars than actually live the christian life. usually seen on vehicles speeding and cutting people off in traffic.
that car that ran over my grandma's feet had a jesus fish on it. the driver must have been late for church.
909👍 315👎
A time when it is so late that even Jesus Christ would be tuckered-out.
See also: Jesus Hot, Jesus Cold, Jesus Lot, Jesus Sweet, Jesus Late, and Jesus Early
I got home so Jesus Late that my parents grounded me for 10000 years.
26👍 5👎
A condition usually applied to houses in the Christmas time that are completely covered in flashing lights and a Nativity scene. A house will only be raving to Jesus if the lights are flashing and a Nativity scene is present.
I couldn't sleep last winter, the house across the street was raving to Jesus.
5654👍 2125👎
Dick so good that it heals all of your ailments
Girl: I thought you weren't going out tonight because you had a headache
Friend: I wasn't but then I hit up Ryan... He got that Jesus dick
24👍 4👎
Decorative lawn ornament, popular through much of New england, where an old cast-iron bathtub is buried standing up, halfway into the ground, and a statue of Jesus is placed inside. Frequently seen near or with a lawn ball. Associated with white trash.
I saw a great bathtub jesus in Pawtucket last week.
39👍 9👎