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Turd Swap

Get your girl to lie on her back and lift up her legs. She then spreads open her arsehole and you proceed to shit in it. She then shits out your shit back into yours. This can be repeated many times.

I did a turd swap with my girlfriend last night, we have come really far in our relationship.

by StJohnsUrbanTruthTeller August 11, 2017


wet turd

A piece of extremely damp turd that drips out after drinking a shit tone of energy drinks

"He is a wet turd"

by LittleSlice March 27, 2014


Hurty Turds

Noun: Can denote a case of extreme constipation, but also a case of diarrhea, in which one has shat so much that the rectal area becomes irritated. Can also be used when one has consumed extremely spicy foods, causing the fecal matter to be spicy itself, and burn the anus as it exits, or large amounts of dairy product, such as cheese. Basically, any bowel movement that causes discomfort or pain.

Jeez, I really love that curry chicken my coworker made, but it gave me a raging case of the hurty turds.

That hurty turd was so damned big, I thought I was gonna have to have an episiotomy!!!! I was in the corner like Rocky, screaming "Cut me, Mick!!!!"

by Gunslinger19405 December 3, 2011


Swerving Turd

A trim line on Chrysler, Dodge and Ram vehicles that costs extra to upgrade your steering from being held together by spaghetti, to something more stiff like crucifix wood from the Churches they are constantly going to. It allows others to see how adept they are at trying to keep their Chrysler within two lanes on the highway, and glide them almost without effort into rest areas or the breakdown lane. It also allows Chrysler drivers to use up only two parking spaces instead of the usual three or four when they park at a Trump rally or their job at a hotel sniffing farts out of bedsheets.

Even with her morbid obesity, Irene was able to stay 30mph under the speed limit in the passing lane in her Chrysler as 18 wheelers passed around her, and thanks to the Swerving Turd package, she still could stay on the phone with her church group.

by Arial3535 August 27, 2020


Turd Sack

A couple that both has incredible farting abilities and constantly blows up the bathroom

Regina turd sacked in the bathroom toilet drenching up the whole apartment.

by GeenaBeena January 27, 2018


FaceTuned Turd

When you can smell someone’s must through their deodorant

Eww that girl next to you smells like a FaceTuned Turd 💩.

by Caiayna March 18, 2019


Turd Burglar

A person who climbs in through an unlocked window to steal someone's fresh turd before they've even had a chance to flush it.

An dedicated Turd Burglar will then wait for the ideal moment to throw his stinking, hot, wet, prize; through the open window of a passing car.

You'll find at least one Turd Burglar in every large town or city

'Where's it gone. Why is the window open?'

'The turd burglar. He's struck again.'

(Hysterical Screaming)

by travisbickle86 February 18, 2018