Random
Source Code
Random
Verb.
1. To commence an undertaking.
2. To beat the crap out of someone.
3. To fuck wildly.
4. To turn the tables during an Ultimate Frisbee game.
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1. We should really open up shop on Project Apollo.
2. If he keeps pissing me off, I'm gonna open up shop on that asshole.
3. Dude, she's hot. I'd definitely open up shop on her.
4. We were losing pretty badly until we gave up the zone defense and opened up shop on them.
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The perfect oportunity for a bored housewife to buy a ton of useless shit on her husband's credit card.
$300 for a solar-powered toothbrush with a built-in hedge trimmer. I'll buy it!!
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A place where sex is currency
A place where teenage boys wish their girlfriends would go
A place where handcuffs aren't for law enforcement
A shop that somehow survives without customers
A place where bras dont need to cover the nipple
A place where desperate women go to flll the hole
A place that sells DVD's with unusually bad acting
A place where things that vibrate strictly arent for cleaning teeth
Alice: I picked up something from the Anne summers shop today
Joe: Fuck yes! ive been waiting for this all my life
Alice: And you wont be dissapointed
Joe: *Jizz in pants
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A slang term for a homosexual in British culture. It is so termed because instead of 'shopping' at the normal crevice the participant has decided to do their 'shopping' round the other side.
James: Graham Norton does his shopping round the corner!
Chris: You mean he goes to Somerfields? I knew that guy was a fucking weirdo..
James: No I mean he likes to shove his erect penis into the chocolate starfish of other men.
Chris: Oh so he shops at Morrisons then?
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1. Losing your virginity.
2. Having sex with a virgin.
Kelly: I had sex with David last night.
Marie: Really, was he any good?
Kelly: It was really awkward. He told me afterward that he was a virgin.
Marie: So you were the first person to visit his flower shop, eh?
Mark: So, what are you doing tonight man?
Ronnie: I'm visiting the flower shop. Sarah's finally letting me in her pants.
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1. Check the dirty laundry. While you woman is in the shower, check her bra and panty size. Nothing ruins a sexy gift of lingerie quicker than buying her something two sizes too big. No matter how good she looks, she's self concious about her figure.
2. You are not shopping for Heidi Klum. Be realistic about your selection of lingerie. Buy something appropriate to your woman's body type. Does she have a baby belly, and an awesome rack? Shop a baby doll which draws the eyes to the cleavage, and covers the belly. That corset may look hot on some 90lb boob jobbed model, but your woman will hate it. She may actually want to draw a breath at some point in the evening.
3. Don't be shy. When you are at the lingerie store, get one of the ladies to help you. Now don't be a creep about this, but try to pick out a sales lady with your lady's body type. Give her your woman's measurments early, and she can lead you to something appropriate.
And again, don't be a creep. Keep your eyes on the task.
4. KISS Keep It Simple, Stupid. Think of lingerie as gift wrapping. You want easy access. You do not want to be fighting with a half dozen doubleback hooks, behind her back, while in the throes of passion. A drawstring at the cleavage is perfect. Fun and easy to reveal the prize inside.
5. Complete the package. So you've got some lingerie she will look hot in. Does it need stockings? Again, consult with the sales lady. Buy her favorite wine, or choclate covered strawberries.
rules of lingerie shopping lingerie sexy naked nekkid girlfriend wife underwear naughty lace ladyfriend unmentionables panties bra G-string gift
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When at the mall,grocery store,gas station ect.. and acting like your shopping but really are trying to get a women to take interest in you.
I'm telling you walking into the grocery store with my uniform on makes pussy shopping so easy, like shooting fish in a barrel
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