A Crunch is a serious bowel movement. A bowel movement so fierce and powerful that it becomes less of a simple action and more of an event. One's day can be completely centered around the acting of a crunch, such a time is referred to as Crunch Time.
Nick: Oh God...
Justin: What?
Nick: I feel it coming...
Justin: What?
Nick: OMG! Where's your bathroom?!
Justin: Over there...why?
Nick: It's coming!
Justin: What's coming?!
Nick: A CRUNCH!
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It is the pinnacle of a "do or die" moment when one's life and or many lives are in peril and to have the bravery and testicular fortitude to save the day above all costs.
Mighty Boosh S1 ep3 Saboo and Tony Harrison on a flying carpet:
Saboo: What are you going to do when we come to the crunch?
Tony Harrison: ohhhhhhh my word, are we back to the crunch?
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sit-ups
"you better start doing some crunches if you wanna lose that pooch for the summer."
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A person with such an overwhelming personality, it sucks the energy out of their peers.
"Kim, would you ever date that guy?"
"Nah Wang. He cute but he mad crunch doe."
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Synonymous to hitting on, having a crush on, or wooing someone. Can also be used to describe the act of throwing someone the sex eyes.
Originally coined in the movie "Never Been Kissed" with Drew Barrymore.
Girl-"Guy is totally crunching on you."
Barrymore-"Do I wanna be crunched?"
Girl-"By Guy? Oh yeah."
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The specific name for the Camden Munch, in London. Run and attended by fetishists/ rubberists/ kinksters of the finest order.
'I am looking forward to the Crunch this Friday, especially as it's Dolly's birthday - she'll be getting her kink on, no doubt!'
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v. crunched, crunchβ’ing, crunchβ’es
v. tr.
1. To crush, grind, or tread noisily while taking a Dump.
2. The act of taking a huge shit
3. Slang. To perform operations on; manipulate or process (numerical, mathematical or fecal data).
v. intr.
1. To move feces with a crushing sound.
2. To produce or emit a crushing sound during the act of shitting.
n.
1. A modified sit-up position having a smaller range of motion that reduces back strain and strengthens the abdominal muscles when pushing out shit.
I just took a huge crunch, it almost knocked down a wall in the bathroom.
I need to stop eating so much cheese, I haven't had a good crunch in weeks.
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