Abbottabad

n. A modern city near Islamabad with a thriving economy and vibrant night life in spite of an overwhelmingly blind population. Home to a large military officer training centre, a security police academy, a large sophisticated army base, and a cadre of well known international terrorists in a well-appointed glaringly-obvious hideout.

Famous for its complex network of blind alleys and home to the Pan-Asia bronze medal winning Hide-and-Seek team this modern metropolis, nestled in the fog-shrouded mountains of North East Pakistan, has recently almost seen the opening of yet another factory to manufacture the signature white canes which are synonymous with Abbottabad industry.

Tourist attractions include the Referee and Umpire Museum and a zoo devoted almost entirely to bats, cave fish, moles, and deaf chickens with cataracts and glaucoma. Visitors can feel secure knowing that in the event of any threat modern interceptor aircraft can be scrambled from Islamabad and will arrive in about a week: two weeks tops if it's a bit cloudy.

Excuse me Major, can you tell me where the Abbottabad bus station is?

Certainly. Take a left at the Bin Laden compound and then it's just past the Willful Ignorance Airbase on Death To America Avenue.
If you get lost ask the tall guy with the Saudi accent for help ... but don't let him drive.

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