Aunt Martha

A crazy old woman that likes to wear bubushkas and keeps her nylons rolled down to her ankles. Can often be found hanging out near all-girl Catholic schools in her spare time. Likes the finer things in life such as a half-drunk can of warm Old Milwaukee and a few random cigarette butts that were found outside the local probation office. Has a terrific appetite for cupcakes and cheese.

My Aunt Martha just sent me a birthday card with a shiny new quarter inside of it.

7👍 3👎

Sneaky Aunt Martha

(n.) a surprise technique used by a woman being fucked from behind. The woman buries her face in a pepper covered pillow to make herself sneeze at the same time her man starts to cum. The sneeze will cause her vaginal muscles to grip his ejacualting dick like the airway-constricting hug from fat Aunt Martha little boys try to hide from at family reunions.

My wife’s Sneaky Aunt Martha hugged my dick so tight, I was gasping for air when I busted a nut.

aunt martha kiss

When you give a half lip, dry, side kiss to someone with no passion or feeling. Like you would your 'Aunt Martha' when she comes to town.

I walked in the door and she gave me an 'Aunt Martha kiss'. I was like "Ewww, so it's like that now?'