Basners

A Basners is a type of creature that believes in eating the whole pizza, included the crust. Crusts are the best part of the pizza, their crunchy and full of Christmas. Basners gives out booklets to her neighbors on why crust lives matter. Her neighbors tend to avoid her because of this. Basners also find people who take the cheese off their pizza disgusting. “No normal human beans do that, it’s a disgrace to humanity.” - actual quote from a Basners

Random kid who throws his pizza crust out:

Basners: STOP. DROP. AND ROLl.
Also Basners: And take your hands out of your pants, that’s not how you get the girls.