Chimp oneself red

v. To furiously relax in a gentleman's way; to masturbate.

Thomas didn't appear that evening for dinner, nor the next morning at breakfast. Eventually shuffling into the dining room a little after two o'clock in the afternoon, looking exhausted and sporting a thousand-yard stare, between drawn-out breaths and with a weary demeanour, he stated that he'd spent the past twenty-two hours chimping himself red.

Chimp Oneself Red

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