dire rear

When you have loose bowels. Diarrhea. You know, when your rear is in a dire situation.

That curry gave me dire rear!

Dire Rear

experiencing gas, bloating, cramps, and explosive diarrhea, usually caused by strange or unusual foods

The seafood stew was rich and tasty at the time, but was probably the cause of the dire rear later that night.

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Dire rear

Noun/phrase. A traumatising bowel movement often characterised by a watery stool consistency and difficulty or discomfort in execution. Alternate spelling of 'diarrhoea'.

"I've got a dire rear today; I was in the toilet for an hour and a half"