euphanism

noun. pronunciation key. "yoof-anism"

(1) A neologism combining euphemism and onanism.
(2) Any colloqialism for masturbation.

"Making the bald man cry" is a euphanism.

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euphanize

to say something in the nicest way possible
and thereby destroy its meaning
used in the same was as euthanized

Ted (geek): let's go out
Sally: I don't really think that would work
Ben: wow, she really euphanized the crap out of that

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