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Forky Forky

1) The game made famous at Bloodstock Open Air 2008.

Rules:

1. The Fork must be ENTIRELY made of metal, equally balanced, and have four prongs. All other forks are illegal.

2. Game tools are: - 1 Fork, 1 Courgette (cucumber allowed that has to be softened), and two to infinity billion players who must form a circle. The courgette must be placed in the middle of the circle.

3. To win a game of 'Forky Forky', you must score 1,000 points.

4. This is only achieved by getting 1,000 Forky Forkys or 'Erecting the fork in the courgette'.

5. A Forky Forky is achieved when the fork lands in the ground with an angle greater than 45 degrees.

5.1 When angle is disputed, benefit of the doubt is given to the player i.e. if the fork looks 'about' 45 degrees, it is a Forky Forky.

6. Achieving a throw where the fork is 'Erect in the Courgette' is defined by either the 4 prongs piercing the courgette while the rest of the fork is touching nothing else or the body of the fork is piercing the courgette in the same manner. This achieves 1,000 points and therefore wins the game.

6.1. The player who erects the Fork in the courgette must take a bite out of said courgette, in order to be declared the winner.

7. The game will last until a player achieves the target of 1,000 points or a traditional clock reaches 10:40, either am or pm.

8.Should the fork land and remain touching the courgette, all participants should shout ' IT IS TOUCHING THE COURGETTE!!'.

8.1 - Should a player achieve a Forky Forky and the fork itself is touching the courgette, but not erect in it, the team of players must shout 'FEELY FEELY!' and proceed in a fashion as underlined in rule 9.

9. Should anyone achieve a 'Forky Forky' as stated above, everyone should shout 'FORKY FORKY!' and dance in a clockwise direction, while shouting 'Forky Forky' in unison until the next place in the circle is reached. If an inverted Forky Forky is achieved (whereby the Fork lands in the ground with the prongs pointing upwards) then players must dance anticlockwise.

10. A regulation Forky Forky throw is underarm, and must be thrown upwards, and the fork must rotate at least 360 degrees while in the air.

11. Fouls. There are 3 disciplinary actions:
a) - The Pescetarian Card - this is awarded to any player who threatens another Forky Forky competitor at any point. The punishment is that the perpetrator has to sit out the game until another Forky Forky is achieved.
b) - The Vegetarian Card - this is awarded to any player who throws a fork in the vicinity (within a meter) of any other player, or throws the fork in an illegal manner (i.e. overarm, downwards throw, no 360 degree rotation). The punishment is sit out the game until the next Forky Forky is thrown and no alcoholic beverages are to be consumed.
c) - The Vegan Card - same as the Vegetarian Card but the perpetrator must remove an item of clothing and cannot replace this item until the game has finished i.e. when a player attains 1,000 points, or it gets to 10:40. This card is deployed when a player hits another player with the fork.

12. All players must be consuming an alcoholic beverage during the game. (Unless they're non-drinkers....they still have to have some sort of beverage in their hand though....and be prepared to probably be drunkenly berated.)

13. Injuries - should an injury occur, injury time is employed. During injury time, the player injured is allowed to treat their maladies, unless untreatable, and until then, all players must switch to their weaker hands, so as to prevent an unfair advantage. The injured player must return to the game within 3 Forky Forkys or is therefore disqualified from the game.

14. An impartial referee maybe employed but is not necessary. It is expected that all players use reasoning when employing the Forky Forky rules.

15. At the end of any game of Forky Forky, each player must kiss the courgette goodbye.

16. Rule amended from BOA 08. No racism! (or at least not too much.)

17. In the spirit of the game, if a player should fall over at any time whilst playing, then every other player must immediately rush to their aid and hug them. Preferably before they have a chance to get up.

18. After numerous questions on the matter it has become necessary to clarify: When a winner is crowned and takes a bite from the courgette, spit or swallow? ALWAYS SWALLOW! It's rude not to.

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2) One of the scores in Forky Forky achieved by the fork sticking into the ground at an angle of 45 degrees or greater. Earns the thrower 1 point.

"FORKY FORKY! FORKY FORKY!"
"IT IS TOUCHING THE COURGETTE!"

by WorMzy August 12, 2009

47👍 6👎


forky forky fork fork

fucky fucky fuck fuck… i mean nazi knight is coming.

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white: no way a fork
black: forky forky fork fork

by apqmwn October 20, 2024