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human bidet is that special class of creature that feels the need to prostrate themself behind bosses, managers, social higher ups such that they give an extra ass cleaning, far beyond the normal ass kissing. Human bidets are close relatives but much luckier than human urinals, who constantly get pissed on by everyone.
That idiot got promoted ahead of me. He wouldn't have got this far if he wasn't such a human bidet!
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Using the face, mouth and tongue to clean someone’s ass after taking a dump. Sometimes referred to human toilet paper or htp. It described to be very arousing and once someone has properly experienced this event they dont want it any other. Can be recorded being a common practice with concubines.
She is sooo hot I wish I could be her human bidet.
When someone spits saliva or urine into another persons butthole.
Make sure you use the human bidet after you take a dump.
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the human Bidet can be done solo, with two people, and even with a group. a solo human Bidet is when you take a shit and you pee while still sitting down and it rolls down your nut and taint and cleans your bum. the human Bidet with a partner is the same, but one person gets up and the other pisses on their bumhole, this one is much more effective. the group human Bidet is the same but with a bunch of people pissing on the poopers bumhole, this is the most effective variant.
"dear diary, today I shitted and ran out of kittens to wipe with, but thankfully I peed and it was a human Bidet, so it was ok in the end"
"hey playbou carti can you give me some human Bidet"
"precinct 6 get to hemorrhoid street ASAP, there's a guy here who needs some group human Bidet"