Infomercial Hands

Hands that can't do anything correctly. Infomercial Hands can't strain a pot of pasta or screw in a lightbulb or push buttons on a phone, so they require the purchase of a new fangled item that will come to the rescue.

Scott: What's with that guy? Why can't he tie his shoes?
Peter: He's suffering from Infomercial Hands. He clearly needs ShoeTie™.