Rural Dictionary

Jacksonville

Jacksonville is the gateway to hell. If Florida is an anomalous wasteland, Jacksonville is the apex of Florida. Home to one of the only north flowing rivers, the St. Johns, Jacksonville is a very geographically and politically important city. It is the largest city in the United States land-wise, and has one of the highest murder rates, along with a large ghetto. It's also the unofficial capital of Florida (Damn Tallahasee). If you want to go here, we're quite the interesting city once you get used to the screams and organs.

Disclaimer: The previous statement about screams and organs is false. However, some bastards do traffic children. If you see this, shoot on site.

"Ah yes, Jacksonville. Simultaneously the best and worst city in the entire united states. Wait, what? You weren't asking about Jacksonville? Huh, sorry."

by Enny Gama June 20, 2020

31👍 3👎

Jacksonville

A City in Northeast Florida, known also as Duval, "Da BangEm", and 904 etc.

Jacksonville is a unique city. With one of the top three murder rates in the country, 7 beaches within 20 miles, a river that runs straight through it (one of two rivers in the world that runs north), and the largest land mass of any city in the United States, its anything but ordinary.

With one of the largest ghettos in the country, (Northside/Westside) its hard not to have a large murder rate. And we do.

Jacksonville is a diverse city, with some of everything, Latinos, Whites, Blacks, and is definatley not the Nascar loving city many people think it to be.

Most tourists come to jacksonville for the beaches, or for the superbowl that was held in 2005.

Many Famous musical artists came from jacksonville, such as lynyrd skynyrd, young cash, red jumpsuit apparatus, shinedown, yellowcard, 38. special, florida boys, along with many more.

Jacksonville is also home to the Jaguars, arguably one of the most Gangsta NFL teams, with players like Reggie Nelson and Rashean Mathis.

All in all, Jacksonville is a great city, and im proud to represent da 904.

All these other haters cant handle the beast of the south that is DUVAL.

"Hey, did you catch the Jags game last nite where Mathis intercepted Rothlisberger twice and ran for touchdowns?"

"Yeah, nothin but straight G's come outta J-ville"

"There are also a few bands of Vigilantes operating in the 904, such as J.I."

"WTF"

"Jacksonville"

by Von Fuchs July 2, 2009

169👍 87👎

Jacksonville

Home. The spawning pleace of many great bands (Lynyrd Skynyrd, Evergreen Terrace). And also, some not so great ones (Limp Bizkit, Through Thick and Thin). Its the largest city in the U.S area wise. People say population is what matters, but fuck that shit. We may not have all that much, but at least we can fit them comfortably. So places like "Miami's Metro Area" can keep their 50 or what ever million people. At the end of the day, I dont go home to an overcrowded town house neighborhood, full of illegal immigrants. The only thing Miami does for anybody is supply the largest amount of Cubans known to man. And nobody gains anything from that.

Jacksonville is the only place to have two Top 10 Best High Schools in the United States, and then 15 minutes away have a school so bad its run by the government.

Jacksonville has about 20-30 ghettos, if you get technical. And about 50,000 kids who like to think that they're in a "crew".

Jacksonville has the 2nd best Hardcore scene in the U.S. 1st is Boston, 3rd is Ocala, and 4th is Miami. But fuck Miami.

We have 7 bridges, and just as many beaches. But most of them are over-crowded with slutty girls and 20 year old men who think they can lift a car.

Jacksonville has the largest death rate in all of the U.S behind Detroit, and possibly L.A.

If you talk shit about someone in Jacksonville, you will be jumped. Its almost mandatory.

Fuck people who say Jacksonville is full of Rednecks. They don't know shit, or either had a bad experience. Jacksonville is mostly uptight old people who hate kids like my friends and I. Despite the thought that Jacksonville is a redneck run, racist to death, cousin fucking, NASCAR loving city, come take a visit. Youll see it is the opposite.

It is in fact run by Satan himself. Who also goes by The First Baptist church. Seriously, fuck them. Evergreen Terrace has a song on their new album "Wolfbiker", that is dedicated to TFBCOJ. "We are the wicked, who walk these streets, down by the lighthouse, on the Riverside", is a lyric in the song after the Church slandered every Hardcore kid who has gone to a show at Thee Imperial(The best venue in the World, R.I.P). They called them all demons, and spawns of Satan. That we contribute nothing to society. But thats not true. Were not evil.

Pretty much, Jacksonville is a very nice place, if you know where your going, and who your talking to. Come visit us. Ill party with you.

P.S-Duval is the best county. Fuck what cha heard.

Jacksonville bends Miami over the couch and rapes it with a meat tenderizer.

by Arlington904Duval July 11, 2008

367👍 260👎

Jacksonville

It has the largest city proper population in the state of Florida, but is somehow not as well known as Miami, Tampa, Orlando, or even Tallahassee. It is a very large city with absolutely nothing special about it, and there is absolutely no reason to go there ever.

It has a high crime rate and a beach (something very hard to come by in Florida). Oh yeah, they also have the most forgettable team in the NFL. The architecture is also underwhelming. It is not known for any good universities museums or culture. Jacksonville personified would be that guy at the office that you for got existed years ago even though he sits 3 desks from you.

Person 1: Hey, let's go to Jacksonville for vacation.

Person 2: Jacksonville NC?

1: No...

2. Oregon?

1. No...

2. Mississippi?

1. NO, that is JACKSON ... I meant Florida.

2. You mean like Disney World?

1. No.

2. Is that close to Miami Beach?

1. No.

2. How about no.

1. Ok.

by Flick507 May 7, 2011

59👍 50👎