Rural Dictionary

McLovin

From superbad; someone who uses a fake id to try and buy alcohol, gets hit in the face, hangs out with the cops all day, knocks a guy out in a bar, shoots at a stop sign, barely fucks a girl, and destroys a cop car-blaming it all on a crack addict

Fogell: Yo guys! Sup?
Seth: Fogell, where have you been, man? You almost gave me a goddamn heart attack. Let me see it. Did you pussy out or what?
Fogell: No noooo, man. I got it; it is flawless. Check it!
Evan: examining the fake ID Hawaii. All right, that's good. That's hard to trace, I guess. Wait... you changed your name to... McLovin?
Fogell: Yeah.
Evan: McLovin? What kind of a stupid name is that, Fogell? What, are you trying to be an Irish R&B singer?
Fogell: Naw, they let you pick any name you want when you get down there.
Seth: And you landed on McLovin...
Fogell: Yeah. It was between that or Muhammed.
Seth: Why the FUCK would it be between THAT or Muhammed? Why don't you just pick a common name like a normal person?
Fogell: Muhammed is the most commonly used name on Earth. Read a fucking book for once.
Evan: Fogell, have you actually ever met anyone named Muhammed?
Fogell: Have YOU actually ever met anyone named McLovin?
Seth: No, that's why you picked a dumb fucking name!
Fogell: Fuck you.
Seth: Gimme that. All right, you look like a future pedophile in this picture, number 1. Number 2: it doesn't even have a first name, it just says "McLovin"!
Evan: What? One name? ONE NAME? Who are you? Seal?
Seth: Fogell, this ID says that you're 25 years old. Why wouldn't you just put 21, man?
Fogell: Seth, Seth, Seth. Listen up, ass-face: every day, hundreds of kids go into the liquor store with fake IDs, and every single one says they're 21. Pssh, how many 21 year olds do you think there are in this town? It's called fucking strategy, all right?
Evan: Stay calm, okay? Let's not lose our heads. It's... it's a fine ID; it'll... it's gonna work. It's passable, okay? This isn't terrible. I mean, it's up to you, Fogell. This guy is either gonna think 'Here's another kid with a fake ID' or 'Here's McLovin, a 25 year-old Hawaiian organ donor'. Okay? So what's it gonna be?
Fogell: grinning ... I am McLovin!
Seth: No you're not. No one's McLovin. McLovin's never existed because that's a made up dumb FUCKING FAIRY TALE NAME, YOU FUCK!
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Cop: McLovin, you realize, by signing this you are saying that a crack addict stole our car and did who knows what with it, are you ok with that

McLovin:O, yeah
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Officer Michaels: McLovin?
Fogell: Yeah.
Officer Michaels: Great name.
Officer Slater: It is, it just rolls of the tongue.
Officer Michaels: 'Sounds like a sexy hamburger!
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Officer Michaels: How old are you McLovin?
Fogell: Old enough.
Officer Michaels: Old enough for what?
Fogell: To party.

by "I Am McLovin" March 17, 2009

448👍 89👎