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A sexual position in which the man (or dyke) shits aggressively on a pecan swirl, generously lathering it. The woman then sticks it in her clitoris and sings Merry Clitmas until she cries. This is repeated until one person busts a creamy load.
Jon couldn’t bust so Merry Clitmas lasted until August!
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This one can be very tricky, so fasten your sleigh belts. Step 1: Dress up like Santa clause. Step 2: Fit your way down someone’s chimney. Step 3: This involves some luck. The hope is that you landed in a house with a hot hoe hoe hoe and a sleeping husband. The hoe has had too much to drink so she wonders her way downstairs when she hears a loud bang. Thinking you are her husband, she de-clothes herself and sneaks up on you. Step 4: Proceed to pound the hoe hoe’s fruit cake until it has enough whipped topping. Step 5: Flick her bean, and yell “Merry Clitmas”. Step 6: Get the hell outta there. Her husband has probably awoken by now and is sprinting down the steps with his shotgun ready to blow your meat missile off to Jupiter... **kinky**
Tyrant: Bro how was your Christmas?
Big Easy: It was pretty eventful. I sharted multiple times and had a five dollar footlong for breakfast. Hbu?
Tyrant: Boy I’ll tell ya I had an amazing Christmas! Almost didn’t make it out alive. Long story short, I went to some hoe’s house and popped her cherry. Then I yelled Merry Clitmas and booked it outta there. I think her dad was coming to teach me a lesson. Turns out he was a cop, so good thing I high tailed it outta there.
Big Easy: Damn I wish I was as cool as you.
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