Moronto

Where you'll find the largest population of Morons in Canada; Toronto.

I LOVE Moronto and I'm a proud Morontonian.

I was reading the Moronto Star today - what? Yes, yes, I can read. No, not just texts and abbreviations - full words too. No, I'm not a Morontonian.

I was watching City Panic 24 earlier and they had a breaking news bulletin: the Gardiner and 401 aren't blocked. Thousands of Morontonian's have never prepared for such a crisis and have no idea how to react, so they all decided to make up their own speed limit and subsequently caused numerous crashes, and now all the roads are a clusterfuck again. Oh well, it was good while it lasted.

BUDDY #1: Eh, buddy, ya goin-a-da Cheronno Make-Beliefs game tanite?
BUDDY #2: Ah, yah, bud!
BUDDY #1: Ah, now dats a TRUUUUE Morontonian fer ya, eh!

I'm an unemployed Morontonian because I got fired from McDonald's when they found out I smoked crack because, you know, it's not just some nickel-and-dime job like mayor of the city or something. Getting the next Big Mac to the next customer is so much more important than running a city, and I wouldn't want to be a bad role model to the youngsters I serve Happy Meals to.

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