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Portugal is a fictitious country made up by the shapeshifting alien race known as Brazilians. The Brazilians made it up to cover up the fact they are from outer-space. Anybody who says they're from Portugal are Brazilian actors, and anyone who has "visited" Portugal were actually just drugged and flew to Brazil. They're so high they think that they are in Portugal.
Guy 1: Dude, I just visited Portugal, the beaches were so beautiful.
Guy 2: Portugal doesn't exist, you just visited Brazil, but were so high that you thought you were in Portugal.
Guy 1: What the fuck?
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Portugal is a country that proudly holds on to its traditions. That's why the Lonely Planet description of it from 1968 - "a country extremely poor and rural, whose people don't even know how to speak their own language" - is still very accurate.
A country that once ruled half of the world, with a sense of pride so ridiculous that it still brags about holding the oldest alliance in the world with the British, who ultimately lead to the collapse of the Portuguese Empire by screwing it over about some African colonies.
It's run by mobsters headquartered in the parliament house who burn down its natural heritage and kill its people in an annual festivity called "Forest Fires". The festivities take place between June and October and also consist of throwing charity events hosted by celebrities for raising money for the victims of the traditional forest fires, and then giving the money to friends and family of the mayors of the towns affected.
The southern region of Portugal (Algarve) is a region of paradisiac beaches bathed by the Atlantic ocean and often receiving warm currents from the Mediterranean. It's densely populated by Brits who consistently justify the national budget for security and civil protection forces. The local government does all the restructuring and construction works during the summer, causing massive traffic jams and general chaos, but it has to be like that because during the winter there's no one there to see the region's progress.
German tourist - Things in Portugal are even more expensive than in Germany!!!
Portuguese person - Yeah, but your salary is 4 times higher than ours! Oh, wait...
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Noun
A republic in SW Europe, on the Iberian Peninsula.
Verb
To somehow complete a task despite looking wholly incompetent throughout the process.
Wow, he may not look like he's gonna do it, but he certainly Portugal'd his way into landing Ivy! That is despite forgetting about her gluten allergy at their first date!
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Best country of the World.
Unfortunately taxes are bigger than the country itself.
Still, an historical country that has a good clime, great landscapes and beaches.
Excelent for vacation.
Oh, and beautiful, beautiful women.
A peaceful place, optimal for vacation and full of darn nice ladies?
Portugal is the answer.
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A beautiful country, it's small but a lot to discover, the food is delicious, people and women are gorgeous, it's basically a very healthy place to live in.
A great country to live without hassle from the cities or pollution.
One last thing, every Portuguese is proud of being from Portugal, the one who said "Portuguese wish they'd be Spanish" it's complete bull-crap.
Spain is a wonderful country too, I love it, but Andorra even more because I went there for vacation when I was a kid and it's awesome when it's the season of snow.
Portugal isn't a big country but it's excellent for a great lifestyle, and healthy food, plus other things which people like a lot.
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Portugal; country with the most adventurer people at the history, people without fear. Country who loves the sea, people without fear. People who loves the life, People without fear.
I'm venezuelan but I'm proud of my origin parents (Madeira Island)
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is a small country on the westernmost point of Europe continente. Well known for it's good and tasty food, rich cultural traditions, fado music, sea delights, sardinha, tolerate immigration law, too low salaries, genuine Porto wine, strong football teams and superb quality coffe and haxixe.
Only in Portugal you can see so deep blue sky
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