Purista

A Stupid douche pretending to be a coffee expert like a Barista but acts like a minimalist to give the name a more hipster sound.

Gary: Here is your coffee ma'am.
Tina: Thank you! You are a great barista!
Gary: No ma'am. A barista is someone who works at starbucks. I don't conform to the easiest ways of making coffee. I am a Purista!

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Purista

Noun. A self designation intended to promote oneself as a connoisseur that purports to be simultaneously devoted to both minimalism AND to unending dissection, precise measurement and reporting of data. Applies especially to food and drink.

Purista: "Let's just make love..."
Partner: "Oh yes, right now!!"
Purista: "But first I need to check the temperature, the lumens of light, the resiliance of the mattress and...
Partner: "Forget it. Let's just go out for coffee..."

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