Splooge Tree

Similar to a family tree, but populated with one’s sexual conquests rather than relatives. It is commonly depicted by a phallus representing the trunk, testicles for the roots, and globs of splooge shot from the tip for the foliage (conquests).
(Also known as a “Spooge Tree” or “Fuck Tree”)

Abe painted a mural of his splooge tree on the wall, and the damn thing looks like an overgrown weeping willow.