Texas Massage

1.) When John Wayne comes out of your butt
2.) When you are tied down and stepped on by a horse

Riley: Do you want a Texas Massage?

Shane: HELL NO *runs away*

5👍 3👎

West Texas Massage

when someone beats a rattlesnake to death with a baseball bat or any other hard sports item.

"the other day little john juan yelled snake!"
"what did u do?"
"i gave that serpent a good ol' west texas massage with the woman's sex toy"

5👍 5👎

Texas Massage

A massage using barbecue sauce instead of traditional massage oils.

Ryan- “Any plans this weekend?”
Howdy- “I may find a lady of the night to give me a Texas massage”