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The Tourist

A must-do for any well traveled individual who finds himself on a sandy beach while on vacation. The proccess can be explained in five easy steps.

Step 1: Find a bitch. No, not a female dog.

Step 2: Seduce said bitch.

Step 3: Choose your favorite position and proceed to fuck her.

Step 4: Do not pull out, blow your load inside of her.

Step 5: When she freaks out because she is not on birth control and you didn't wear a condom, throw sand in her face, and run away.

There you have it! The Tourist, in all of its glory, has you leaving fun and little illegitimate souvenirs for all to enjoy!

"You wont believe it, Betty. I was at the beach this morning, and to make a long story short, Im pregnant. I hate The Tourist"!

"Hey man. I went to Cancun for spring break and pulled The Tourist on some Mexican whore. To think my parents said they'd never be grand parents."

by Teh Fader March 20, 2008

4๐Ÿ‘ 9๐Ÿ‘Ž


Touriste

A word used to describe someone who is always confused and is useless at telling jokes and/or understanding jokes. Usually the kind of person you will see tying their shoelaces on an escalator, or farting in an elevator.
The word is usually pronounced with a french accent

Malvyn - Hey guys! Hurry! the metro's about to leave!
Nam - Wait! I forgot my left shoe!
Carlos - Nam is such a touriste!

by EE3bros-bro December 5, 2009

47๐Ÿ‘ 10๐Ÿ‘Ž


Tourist

Stupid assholes from outta town that take pictures of anything and everything and annoy the crap out of all the locals and will stand in the middle of the road, block traffic and almost get hit by a car to take a fucking picture of a church!

btw, I live in alaska
Tourist: what sea level are we at?
Local: about two feet

Tourist: what's that big lake over there?
Local: that would be the ocean

Tourist: How do you say this word in alaskan?
Local: I have no idea
Tourist: Don't you speak alaskan or eskimo?
Local: no, all the eskimos are extinct (walks away)

Tourist: Me and my family have been here all day and we haven't seen any eskimos!!!
Local: thats because all the eskimos and natives are nocturnal, they all come out at night and do their tlingit dances by the fireside. (sarcasm)

by Jordan<3 August 14, 2006

271๐Ÿ‘ 77๐Ÿ‘Ž


Tourist

A person who vacations in people's lives, takes pictures, puts them in his scrapbook, and moves on. All he's interested in are stories. Basically, their selfish.

Any friend who only seems to appear when they deem in necessary as to keep their social status in high regard but otherwise nowhere to be found. If this describes your friend he is a tourist.

by F.O.S.F.F. 7O01 June 29, 2015

84๐Ÿ‘ 23๐Ÿ‘Ž


tourist

foreign visitors who come to see popular sites and attractions... but are often side-tracked by even simpler things... (a telephone pole, a school bus, a bird, a sandwich) signs of their attraction towards native features: accessive photographing, pointing of fingers

Tourist guide: Here we have an active volcano... it's called Killa wayyah...
Tourist: Umm excuse me!
Tourist guide: Yes ma'am?
Tourist: What's that thing you're holding in your hand?
Tourist guide: this? this is a sandwich, it would be my lunch
Group of Tourists: OoOoooh! Ahhhh.... (snapshots)
Tourist: May i have a taste?

by james eakmon November 17, 2003

243๐Ÿ‘ 80๐Ÿ‘Ž


Tourist

An individual who takes part in certain activities or attends particular meetings because they are trendy or popular, usually without regard to whether or not such activities or the subject matter of such meetings interest or pertain to them at all.

Marla Singer is such a fucking tourist for attending multiple affliction-specific support group therapy sessions when she doesn't even have any of those diseases.

by dalbort June 21, 2004

429๐Ÿ‘ 137๐Ÿ‘Ž


touristing

the act of being a tourist

Since we have been in Europe, we have just been touristing around.

by klodogmillionaire October 21, 2011

6๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž