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Zeus

Greek God of Thunder. He also happens to be a hoe as he has no problem banging the shit out of his sisters, daughters, mortals, creatures, and even a man.

Zeus: I'm gonna put my dick in it.

Everyone: Don't put ur dick in it.

Zeus: toO LATE

by Plagiarism2.09gagthief April 22, 2018

296๐Ÿ‘ 21๐Ÿ‘Ž


Zeus

The biggest womanizer of all the gods

"Did you hear. Zeus cheated on Hera again."
"Huh, it must be Tuesday "

by Mendes101 June 25, 2015

194๐Ÿ‘ 16๐Ÿ‘Ž


Zeus

The Greek mythology God of incest and adultery. He also controls lightning or sum shit.

Zeus is the name of a Greek God

by Okazaki Tomoya April 16, 2021

47๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Zeus

Zeus (Jupiter/Jove), supreme ruler of the universe, originally god of thunder and the thunderbolt.

Zeusโ€™ name contains the root for โ€˜skyโ€™ or โ€˜dayโ€™ in a number of languages (Latin dies) and the word โ€˜Godโ€™ (Latin dues).

by โ™ซ Highway to Hell โ™ซ August 4, 2010

459๐Ÿ‘ 111๐Ÿ‘Ž


Zeus

Cronus sired several children by Rhea: Hestia, Demeter, Hera, Hades, and Poseidon, but swallowed them all as soon as they were born, since he had learned from Gaia and Uranus that he was destined to be overcome by his own son as he had overthrown his own fatherโ€” an oracle that Zeus was to hear and avert. But when Zeus was about to be born, Rhea sought Gaia to devise a plan to save him, so that Cronus would get his retribution for his acts against Uranus and his own children. Rhea gave birth to Zeus in Crete, handing Cronus a rock wrapped in swaddling clothes, which he promptly swallowed.
Rhea hid Zeus in a cave on Mount Ida in Crete. According to varying versions of the story:
He was then raised by Gaia.

He was raised by a goat named Amalthea, while a company of Kouretesโ€” soldiers, or smaller godsโ€” danced, shouted and clashed their spears against their shields so that Cronus would not hear the baby's cry. He was raised by a nymph named Adamanthea. Since Cronus ruled over the Earth, the heavens and the sea, she hid him by dangling him on a rope from a tree so he was suspended between earth, sea and sky and thus, invisible to his father.

He was raised by a nymph named Cynosura. In gratitude, Zeus placed her among the stars.

He was raised by Melissa, who nursed him with goat's-milk and honey.

He was raised by a shepherd family under the promise that their sheep would be saved from wolves.

Laurel-wreathed head of Zeus on a gold stater, Lampsacus, c 360-340 BC (Cabinet des Mรฉdailles)
Zeus becomes king of the gods
After reaching manhood, Zeus forced Cronus to disgorge first the stone (which was set down at Pytho under the glens of Parnassus to be a sign to mortal men, the Omphalos) then his siblings in reverse order of swallowing. In some versions, Metis gave Cronus an emetic to force him to disgorge the babies, or Zeus cut Cronus' stomach open. Then Zeus released the brothers of Cronus, the Gigantes, the Hecatonchires and the Cyclopes, from their dungeon in Tartarus, killing their guard, Campe. As a token of their appreciation, the Cyclopes gave him thunder and the thunderbolt, or lightning, which had previously been hidden by Gaia. Together, Zeus and his brothers and sisters, along with the Gigantes, Hecatonchires and Cyclopes overthrew Cronus and the other Titans, in the combat called the Titanomachy. The defeated Titans were then cast into a shadowy underworld region known as Tartarus. Atlas, one of the titans that fought against Zeus, was punished by having to hold up the sky.
After the battle with the Titans, Zeus shared the world with his elder brothers, Poseidon and Hades, by drawing lots: Zeus got the sky and air, Poseidon the waters, and Hades the world of the dead (the underworld). The ancient Earth, Gaia, could not be claimed; she was left to all three, each according to their capabilities, which explains why Poseidon was the "earth-shaker" (the god of earthquakes) and Hades claimed the humans that died.
Gaia resented the way Zeus had treated the Titans, because they were her children. Soon after taking the throne as king of the gods, Zeus had to fight some of Gaia's other children, the monsters Typhon and Echidna. He vanquished Typhon and trapped him under a mountain, but left Echidna and her children alive.
Zeus was brother and consort of Hera. By Hera, Zeus sired Ares, Hebe and Hephaestus, though some accounts say that Hera produced these offspring alone. Some also include Eileithyia and Eris as their daughters. The conquests of Zeus among nymphs and the mythic mortal progenitors of Hellenic dynasties are famous. Olympian mythography even credits him with unions with Leto, Demeter, Dione and Maia. Among mortals were Semele, Io, Europa and Leda.
Many myths render Hera as jealous of his amorous conquests and a consistent enemy of Zeus' mistresses and their children by him. For a time, a nymph named Echo had the job of distracting Hera from his affairs by incessantly talking: when Hera discovered the deception, she cursed Echo to repeat the words of others.
Hera is also represented as having despised Ganymede, a Trojan boy whom he brought into Olympus to be cup-bearer to the gods as well as his lover.

I think "Zeus" is "Zฮตรบรง"! Zeus is a Greek god, and a great god! *cheers* Hurray for Zeus!!!

by ALEXtheEMO August 4, 2009

114๐Ÿ‘ 27๐Ÿ‘Ž


Zeus

He is the worst god of them all. Suffers from bipolar disorder and many more unnamed mental illnesses. Tends to throw thunderbolts in tantrum state. Is a hypocrite. Is a chronic womanizer, despite marriage to Queen Hera. Must be dethroned as a king. Must be stripped from his title as 'god of justice and law'. Must be killed at sight.

Beware: Most people he dates tend to have horrible fate.

Ancient Greek Guy 1: I heard the Olympians teamed up to destroy the god of evil.

Ancient Greek Guy 2: Whom? Hades.

Ancient Greek Guy 1: Naw, dude. Hades is lit. Zeus 'Can't-Keep-It-In-His-Pants-EAT-LIGHTNING-old-guy' was the one that got destroyed. He deserved it.

by Hestia4Lyf December 27, 2018

20๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


zeus

King of the Greek Gods, NOT God of the Gods. The other Greek Gods did not worship Zeus.

I am Zeus, King of the Greek Gods.

by Fatesadvent October 23, 2006

206๐Ÿ‘ 82๐Ÿ‘Ž