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A small town, just outside the idilic lake district. This town is home to many festivals in which paedophiles, homosexuals, the mentally retarded and 14 year old thugs who just want to get drunk, come together to cause mass destruction and fright to all those in the town. Long haired, bandy legged moshers can be found in the town most noticeably at Lightburn park, The kiosk, various locations around the town center and ford park. It is also home to the finest school in Ulverston, Ulverston Victoria, who recenty failed there ofsted report for being too shit. The town is also home to 21 year old faggots who like to prey upon the hairy-legged, butch school girls of the town.
Ulverston is situated near Barrow-in-furness and Dalton which have high teenage pregnancy rates, large amounts of drugs from the "Liverpool Underground" (I not entirely sure why underground train drivers would want to sell drugs, but hey I'm not God, Michael Barrymore is) and more violence than you could shake a stick at.
There is also rumour that there is an underground tunnel from Ulverston which leads to Oz, I cannot confirm nor deny this.
Recent celebrities spotted in Ulverston include Garry Glitter, Angus Deayton, George Michael and Josef Fritzel.
Christmas is celebrated in March in Ulverston as many of the population of the town are either stupid or morbidly obese.
The town's largest industy is chemical-making with the large "Glaxo" factory on the south coast of the town, pumping out photo-chemical smog and dangerous gases into the town causing low visabilty, lung cancer, gingivitus and scurvy.
Lord Ulverston once said: "All yee who set foot through the fine walls of Ulverston shall be here-by be stabbed and thus thow body shall be thrown from thee bell tower by goats"
Lord Ulverston died shortly after, in 1999, from dementia.
Come to Ulverston and sample some of the fruits of our labour!
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A place where all the people who live there are asexual due to the fact they all look the same, don't shower and rub gravel in there hair for breakfast.. therefore have become a dying breed. Also the first black man was hatched there..he goes by the name of lenny henry.
Ulverston the start of a fall in society!
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A town made of hairdressers, pubs, takeaways,cafes and schools the isn't much to do expect go up hoad and smoke pot at lightburn
Ulverston that place near the failing zoo and on the way to the as shitty barrow
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large town on north-west coast of Tasmania, Australia.
much like many other historic towns the main drag has a few shops and 2 supermarkets that suck the life out of the other small shops.
the only apparent exiting thing that occurs is on Friday nights when the local "hoons" come out to show off in their ricers and rice-burners (see ricers, rice-burner) and hopefully make a fool of themselves to others with street racing. a vast majority of these hoons (see hoons) live in the western portion of the town and can be sometimes seen by day performing tasks such as removing tire tread from tires to make racing slicks for "Friday night".
all this being said, Ulverstone is a nice quiet place to live (aside from Friday) and is only a few minutes drive from 2 small cities, both of which are shipping ports. plenty of parks are available for the elderly to walk/drive/crash-into and if you dont like Ulverstone much, there are plenty of places to buy alcohol to help you forget it.
Ulverstone is a great place to not go unless you like boring quiet things and crappy old bridges
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The HoneyPot is a part of Ulverston Situated Very close to the Canal, The People of the HoneyPot are genrally friendly and considerate however you do find the odd DickHead now and again, in fact theres one that lives at the top of devonshire Road, One of the more colourful characters of the HoneyPot is the Late Kathleen Henderson, a Formidable Lady if there ever was one, but a Kind lady to those who new her. now the HoneyPot is full of drug adicts now, thanks to the local council dumping all the filth there. Pitty realy It was once a Homely Place, Maybe it willbe Again
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