bandsnob

bandsnob

etymology- originally coined by an anonymous prepsnob and noted professor of bandsnobology.

-noun
A teenager who identifies and finds solace in “underground” or subversive adolescent culture. Normally incredibly elitist, the bandsnob is notoriously exclusive only identifying with other subversives while ironically criticizing popular culture for its frivolousness conformity and selectiveness. The bandsnob prefers its music to be controversial and disagreeable (often characterized by its loud obnoxiousness and unintelligible lyrics.) bandsnobs are known for exclusively listening to unknown and obscure bands whom have not yet “hit the scene.” Known for quickly disowning bands that experience any fleeting success, the bandsnob is a fickle, skittish and noncommittal creature. The bandsnob is typically adorned in nonfunctional clothing possibly because of its upsetting affect on popular society and its parents . Wardrobes normally consist of (regardless of gender) a number of tight fitting hoodies*of a solid color or with an outrageous often divisive pattern, tight fitting girls' jeans, stylish and unpractical shoes and a tight fitting band related tee-shirt often with an unintelligible symbolic band logo. This basic outfit does not change regardless of temperature, season or the formality of the occasion. The accessories stereotypical of a bandsnob are carabineer not suitable for climbing for the purpose of holding car keys typically clipped to an outside belt loop, a belt turned sideways at all times so as to not hit the often faux-musician’s guitar, an incredibly large and expensive cell phone that can clearly be seen outlined in their tight pocket with the supposed purpose of planning gigs** and an assortment of earrings and tattoos.

Technical Note
-bandsnob is never capitalized in any of its forms preferring to be controversial in its grammatical incorrectness and to retain its elite trendiness.

*A tight fitting zipper sweatshirt of light cotton with a hood (from which the nickname “hoodie” is suspected to have derived its etymology.)

**A show or performance by a band.
bandsnobing

-verb
The act of doing or partaking in any of the above listed activities.
bandsnobish

-adjective
The description of the subversive teen categorized above.
bandsnobishly

-adverb
Acting in a manner characteristic of a controversial music enthusiast.

bandsnobism
-ideology
the religious or political ideology that centers on the worship and idealization of obscure bands.

bandsnoboligy
-study
The intricate and impartial study of modern rebellious teenage music devotees.

“I’s sorry I can’t go, I have to go to American Appeal and get new girls jeans for the “Among the Trees” and “Sing it Proud” show, I hear there will be a lot of fellow bandsnobs there.

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