beer muff

Reduction in sensation of the female genitalia due to excessive consumption of alcohol. This can lead to inadequate physical arousal and/or inability to achieve orgasm. This is the female equivalent of whiskey dick.

That last pint gave Angela the courage she needed to invite Tom back to her place but, alas, left her with a bad enough case of beer muff that she was unable to truly enjoy it.

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beer muffs

when you think you heard something spectacular only to find out the next day that it wasnt nearly as good as you thought
similar to beer goggles only using hearing not vision

last night i downloaded the best song when i got home from the club. but i must have had my beer muffs on cause today when i listened to it, i wanted to light my ears on fire and proceed to chip away the charred remains

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beer muffs

See also "beer goggles". A certain level of alcohol intoxication renders otherwise attractive people who are annoyingly talkative, less annoying. An ugly annoying person would require both beer goggles and beer muffs. AKA "beer plugs".

She was really annoying, but once I put on my beer muffs, I didn't mind so much.

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beer muffs

n. Mystical auratory additions which remove the necessity for sensiant conversation, and replace any understanding of people speaking to you with a garble mess, to which a derogatory response is necessitated by being stunningly pissed.

"Now, Frank, the oven's on and I'm off out with the girls; remember to feed the baby, check on the dinner and pay the car tax. Okay?"

"I FECKIN' LARVE YOOO, YOOO FACKIN' SEXY MINX"

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beer muffs

When you have so much beer that you don't mind the muff (i.e. a little seasoning goes a long way!)

Dude, did you see that guy who drank the whole kegger, he'll have beer muffs later on tonight!

Enough beer and you'll be diving like Jacques Cousteau!

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beer muffs

When one gets drinking alot and thinks their music is at a reasonable volume that won't upset their neighbors, roommates, etc, but is actually way too loud.

Raoul warned me several times to keep my music down, but I had the beer muffs on again last night and now I'm homeless again.

Beer muffs

An alcohol induced condition of the ears in which members of the opposite sex sound sexy as hell. Usually accompanied by beer goggles and drunk dialing.

I had my beer muffs on last night when I called my friends ex. Her voice made me fill up a little bit.