Guiche

The bit between a man's balls and his arse-hole.

After excretion, wipe from front to back, in order to avoid soiling of the guiche.

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Gandalf's beard

n. see wizard's beard

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welly top

n. similie. A vaginal orofice as large and loose as a rubber wellington boot opening. See also clown's pocket, wizard's sleeve

"It was like throwing a stick down an alleyway, her muff was like a welly top"

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wizard's sleeve

n. similie. A huge twat, akin to Gandalf's cloak in lord of the ring's, from which one could feasibly magically produce a rabbit, a deck of cards and make the empire state building dissapear. See also clown's pocket, welly top

"I nearly lost my head in her wizard's sleeve"

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beer muffs

n. Mystical auratory additions which remove the necessity for sensiant conversation, and replace any understanding of people speaking to you with a garble mess, to which a derogatory response is necessitated by being stunningly pissed.

"Now, Frank, the oven's on and I'm off out with the girls; remember to feed the baby, check on the dinner and pay the car tax. Okay?"

"I FECKIN' LARVE YOOO, YOOO FACKIN' SEXY MINX"

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beer goggles

The strange appearance of contact lenses which elevate previously obnoxious multi warted hogs, to the status of worth having a go on.

"feels warm, smells nice, female... Good start, FUCK Me, i must of been wearing my beer Goggles, hope i had brewers droop, cus i'd hate to see the offspring of this one".

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pan handle

n. Erect cock. captain. boner

She was cooking on full power gripping my pan handle.

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