Eating Watermelon

Chinese net-slang.
The act of consuming a dramatic story typically involving celebrities as it develops WITHOUT GETTING INVOLVED IN THE CONVERSATION, usually via social media posts. These stories are juicy, sweet, and lacking substance, much like a watermelon.

Synonym: buying soya sauce - to indicate one is not involved in the drama currently unfolding.

eg. The crowds of watermelon eaters eagerly wait for more details to be dug up as the story develops.

A: Did you see that post too lol, man I really wanna say something.
B: Don't engage if you don't wanna get trolled, just eat your watermelon and enjoy.

So many stories this year had us eating watermelon non-stop!

eating watermelon

Chinese netspeak.

Indicates that someone is observing but not getting involved.

Originates from an interview in China where reporters asked a man if he saw the incident and he responded 'I have no idea. I'm just eating watermelon'.

I don't know what the couple is fighting about next door. I'm just eating my watermelon.

A: Did you hear about what's going in (place?)

B: I heard but I've been eating watermelon all day!

self eating watermelon

A process or organization with little value or function other than to support its own existence. Similar to a self licking ice-cream cone (see spinnish )

The Orlando Expressway Authority's advertising budget just goes to prove what a self eating watermelon it's become

Eat the watermelon

To give oral sex to a girl. To perform cunnilingus. To eat the sweet, wet, fruit of the female sex.

Ramzi won't eat the watermelon.

I totally want to eat your watermelon, baby!

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eat watermelon behind the stairwell

When you get done having sex, you cum into a watermelon, put it in her ass, then eat it for a snack.

After we fucked she let me eat watermelon behind the stairwell.

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eat watermelon behind the stairwell

When you get done fucking a girl and you cum into a watermelon, put it in her ass, and then eat it.

I fucked Yolowa last night and she let me eat watermelon behind the stairwell afterwards.

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gellin' like a felon eating watermelon

an expressionwearing Dr. Scholls footwear.

Fred:how are those new shoe soles?
Ted: totally far out. i'm gellin' like a felon eating watermelon.