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hammock

A turd holding apparatus constructed from toilet paper spanning laterally from one side of the toilet bowl to the other. The paper is held in place underneath the weight of the toilet seat, and employs simple suspension bridge technology. The engineer shits in the hammock, making toilet paper reinforcements depending on the consistency of the turd (i.e. moisture, viscosity, and density). When all the stalls in a given bathroom have been successfully hammocked, the facility is known to be in a state of "Caribbean hangout."

Me - -Dude, me and all my boys convened in the bathroom during free period and hammocked. Unfortunately, Jimmy never showed up and we were one short of a "Carribbean hangout."

Friend - How selfish.

by the master builder February 7, 2011

83๐Ÿ‘ 44๐Ÿ‘Ž


hammock

pronounced: ham-mick
-noun-

A cradle-shaped net or cloth suspended from two points, designed to hold someone in a different kind of relaxation posture. This free-swinging state is part of a complete summer day's rest scene, along with a strawed, iced drink, a hat, and sunblock.
Lastly, can be made to sound both relaxing and extreme by spelling it as "hammox."

BEWARE: NEVER use a net hammock while fat. The holes will amplify your fat so it disgustingly squeezes through. As if that weren't repulsive enough, you're left with a cross-hatching design on your skin. *shudders*

I laid in the hammock. It was nice.

by Nuclear Tank Tactory March 27, 2009

45๐Ÿ‘ 32๐Ÿ‘Ž


hammock

A large net for catching lazy people.

(per comedian Jim Gaffigan)

They might as well rename it (Hammock) to a large net for catching lazy people.

by floridadude094 April 17, 2009

21๐Ÿ‘ 22๐Ÿ‘Ž


hammock

A sanitary towel of the super-size variety. Will soak up the contents of a boating lake.

The dirty bitch blocked up the shitter with a fucking hammock

by RockMink November 10, 2004

23๐Ÿ‘ 33๐Ÿ‘Ž


hammock

the hairs in a male's (hopefully not female's)asshole/crack that create a "hammock" like shape, home of the dingleberries

I just had a poop 30 minutes ago and I couldn't successfully wipe so now the dingleberries are caked and lodged in my hammock!

by thecuzs August 15, 2008

12๐Ÿ‘ 24๐Ÿ‘Ž


hammock

pronounced: "ham-mick"
(noun)

A cradle-shaped net or cloth suspended from two points, designed to hold someone in a different kind of relaxation posture. This free-swinging state is part of a complete summer day's rest scene, along with a strawed, iced drink, a hat, and sunblock.

Lastly, multiple hammocks can be made to sound both relaxing and extreme by spelling it as "hammox."

WARNING: NEVER use a net hammock while fat. The holes will amplify your fat so it disgustingly squeezes through. As if that weren't repulsive enough, you're left with a cross-hatching design on your skin. *shudders*

I laid in the hammock. It was nice.

by Nuclear Tank Factory June 1, 2009

8๐Ÿ‘ 15๐Ÿ‘Ž


Hammocked

When you get stuck in the hammock because it is so damn comfy!

Dude, I was going to get a beer half an hour ago but I got hammocked and couldn't get up!

by bikindaf July 29, 2009

6๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž