laptop years

A laptop computer ages sixteen years for every human year.

"Dad, I NEED a new laptop! This one is already two years old. That's THIRTY-TWO in laptop years! I can't go to high school with thirty-two-year-old laptop."

"Yeah, my laptop is five years old. That's EIGHTY in laptop years. Sure, she's grumpy and slow, but I'm used to the keyboard and I know where all my programs are. It's like this old La-Z-Boy: molded to my butt."