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Random
life's necessities or the things you need
my life shits are spotify, my dog, cofffee, and my friends
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A defecation so glorious that its passing causes your life up to that point to flash before your eyes due to the sheer emotion provoked by the stool.
Friend A: "Do I hear Brad crying in the bathroom?"
Friend B: "He must have just passed a life-shit!"
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RLS for short... Whenever a story is outdone by some douche-bag who always has to over-exceed your story. Inspired by a co-worker who always seemed to have an extremely intense, more gripping story than I.
John - "Damn man, yeah, one time I hiked Morro Rock and almost slipped and died man."
Forzley - "Oh, really? One time I climbed a similar rock tripped and broke my leg in 3 places, had a stick impaled through my arm, and walked away."
John -"Fuck.. That's real life shit."
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When you've become so close with someone that you can shit on each other's lives without anyone taking offense.
My brother and I are so close that casual life shitting has become completely normal in my house.
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Guard 1: "Life is shit!"
Guard 2: "Yeah, well what can you do?"
From XXX movie with Vin Diesel
Turmoil that happens in real life;
Drama that is so intense and obsurd it seems to be fictional, but is actually Real Life Shit that happens on a daily basis. Almost like living a Tyler Perry Movie, or something else that may seem like it could only happen in movies or on television. (Soap Opera type shit)
Jena' - Did you hear about Tony getting caught sleeping with his fiance's sister AND they momma??
Tonya - Ooooh. His fiance is crazy as hell. I think she's gonna lorena bobbitt his ass. She probably gonna try and do something to them too.
Jena'- Shittin Me!!! She might just merc his dumb ass. Either way..... there's some R.L.S. (Real Life Shit) about to go down on that block.
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Life Affirming Shit (LAS)
A bowel movement or shit that is so fulfilling and so complete that you have an overwhelming desire to find a scale because you know you dropped a pound or two.
The taking of a shit that brings an overwhelming sense of joy or peace.
When your colon gives an extra 20%
AM. Whats up BP. You goode?
BP. I am now, my lady issues just cleared with a life affirming shit, bring awn the skinny jeans!!
BP. How was the work out?
AM. Goode a little strange, in the middle of it i had to take a life affirming shit. Made the final weigh in look really goode.
AM. BP you can get that sense of peace and joy, if while taking a dump, you just rock up in your tippy toes. A normal dump will be come a life affirming shit, that little tilt gives you that extra 20%.