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Maple Milk

Milk produced by a lactating Canadian man.

Most commonly used as the goop they put on poutine and as an alternative for soy.

It is often thick and gluelike, the consistency and volume depending on the T levels of the Canadian man producing the milk, lower T usually equates to higher yields and richer sauce.

Canadian betamales produce the highest grade milk when being analy sodomized by a woman using a strap-on phalus and receiving cock and ball torture simultaneously. This method is called Patookinee and creates a product with a gobsmacking syrup-like stickiness and taste.

The milk produced north of Saskatoon exits the nipples as thin frozen shards, known as Chibuck Nuggets or Chibougeri if you’re a dirty French. Milking Chibuck is described as an intense euphoric agony.

“I heard you met the prime minister! Please tell me you exchanged you maple milk

Maple milk eh.”

“My girlfriend cheated on me eh, gonna go maple milk myself and hope she takes me back tomorrow.”

“Oh I’m sorry about that, didn’t mean to squirt ya, just as you walked by I saw a Muslim migrant holding hands with my wife and I guess I got a little exited...”
“Oh fine fine, I shouldn’t’ve walked through your blast radius, but frankly I’m just amazed that your maple milk managed to shoot out two metres through your shirt!”
“Well yeah, that’s the power of progress...
**O Canada crescendos in the background**

knowing my wife is zer own person, that I don’t own zer body... it’s just... it’s- uh-oh! I feel it coming again! QUICK grab a bowl of poutine! This is good shit right here, I don’t wanna waist it!”
“Ah! All I’ve got is this doughnut, unbutton your shirt and lets glaze this beaut!”

by Resicoi August 4, 2019


Maple Milk

A concoction consisting of Maple Syrup and Milk created by basically... every kid ever and not just two idiots from the south.

"Hey, I heard two Mikes invented this Maple Milk".
"If by 'two Mikes' you mean 'I've had a stroke and am saying stupid things', then yes".

by Sir Wigglesharts Chortlebottom April 25, 2013

26👍 6👎


maple milk

A concoction created by two Michael's in Raleigh, North Carolina using the following logic.

Chocolate syrup + milk = chocolate milk.
Strawberry syrup + milk = strawberry milk.
Maple syrup + milk = maple milk.

It was found to be too strong at times and one could only drink a little of it if too much maple syrup was used. However, if too little is used the results can be just as bad. Work on getting your own mixture down in small doses before making a big glass.

Person 1: I'm thirsty....
Person 2: Oh! Try some maple milk!
Person 1: ...what! That sounds gross!
Person 2: No! I'm serious! *makes a glass*
Person 1: *tries it* ...you're right! This is pretty good!

by Mikey T. November 30, 2006

29👍 19👎