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martinsville

a city that comes alive when NASCAR is in town only. That's when everyone pretends this place ROCKS and everyone LOVES it here and you should move here and open your booming businesses. Why?? Because in all reality, when NASCAR leaves and all you out-of-town morons go home, we all sit at home with the phones off because 1) we're jobless, 2) the town is dead and there's nothing interesting to do here, and 3) we get 10 telemarketers call us every damn day because that's the only jobs available.

Guy #1: Hey, Let's go to Martinsville for the race this weekend!
Guy #2: Yeah! That's the only thing to do there besides eat at the restaurants.
Teen Girl: Like, OMGz Martinsville would TOTALLY suck if it wasn't for the choices of Ethnic foods! Lolz!!!1one

by blackice03 April 14, 2006

53👍 21👎


Martinsville

Used to be the tire and sweatshirt capital of the world, is now the unemployed redneck capital of the world.

Let's go hunt for mullets in Martinsville!

by Pretentious Friend May 13, 2005

67👍 29👎


Martinsville

A little boreing town. It sucks ass, and it's symbol is a pathetic little well.

I hate Martinsville.

by (SIC)Drummer November 7, 2004

52👍 39👎


Martinsville Speedway

The oldest track on the NASCARSprint Cup Calender. It is also where Brian Vickers got Vickerism.

I love the racing at Martinsville Speedway.

by Brian Vickers Sucks November 15, 2011

6👍 1👎


New Martinsville

Cultural-less, skoal chewing, gay bashing, retard hick capital of the world. It is filled with the following: gang members with absolutely no purpose other than to sit in a shitty park and hate on different cultures all day, very few punk rockers that even dare to remain...but that will soon leave or set fire to the city, a cop named larson who is a tad gun happy, a few skaters, and even fewer skaters that believe in their roots, The residence of Bob Miller(only cool place to hang out anymore), fusion...which turned to shit, a vast majority of rednecks, and a music shop who's owners know absolutely jack shit about music, and never work. There is no art in this city, it's considered an abomination, instead it worships football. The only way to survive is to create a reputation. I plan to set it all up in flames. It is the scum of the earth, and is in love with it's own bullshit.
If you decide to visit, please leave ur bandanas at home,make sure to bring a knife, and i suggest not talking to anyone. Only safe place is the river or kiedash. only sane place, kiedash.

New Martinsville: If God took a shit...this is where it would land.

by Vincent Destor January 29, 2008

28👍 33👎


New Martinsville

Cultural-less, skoal chewing, gay bashing, retard hick capital of the world. It is filled with the following: gang members with absolutely no purpose other than to sit in a shitty park and hate on different cultures all day, very few punk rockers that even dare to remain...but that will soon leave or set fire to the city, a cop named larson who is a tad gun happy, a few skaters, and even fewer skaters that believe in their roots, The residence of Bob Miller(only cool place to hang out anymore), fusion...which turned to shit, a vast majority of rednecks, and a music shop who's owners know absolutely jack shit about music, and never work. There is no art in this city, it's considered an abomination, instead it worships football. The only way to survive is to create a reputation. I plan to set it all up in flames. It is the scum of the earth, and is in love with it's own bullshit.
If you decide to visit, please leave ur bandanas at home,make sure to bring a knife, and i suggest not talking to anyone. Only safe place is the river or kiedash. only sane place, kiedash.

New Martinsville: If God took a shit...this is where it would land.

by Vincent Destor January 29, 2008

12👍 21👎


Martinsville

The home of the buckle bunnys

Martinsville is my favorite

by Fred foral September 28, 2022