omphinator

A morbidly obese person who makes no effort to get in shape or lose weight. Often seen carrying fast food bags containing an inhuman amount of greasy cheeseburgers. Omphinators likely will need to remove their pants before commencing a physical altercation due to the fact that they find it difficult to rotate, bend, or wrestle wearing fabric which was never intended to contain a baby-whale sized frame. Have been known to have problems descending stairs because their knees can't support their weight and will buckle causing a priceless comedic situation for onlookers.

Holy fuck Ricky did ya see the gut on Randy? Swear he's gettin bigger everyday.

Sure did Bubbles, omphinator better quit drivin' cheeseburgers in there before he has a fucking heartamattack!