porcelain paint

The art of leaving streaks in the toilet after taking a dump.

The residue left in the toilet after a good crap.

Bob, what the hell did you eat? You left some major porcelain paint!

After that burrito last night, I'm going to leave some porcelain paint.

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Porcelain Painting

The process of having a bowel movement and inadvertently staining the side of the bowl.

I will be back in about 10 minutes, I need to go do some porcelain painting.

painting porcelain

the act of defecating on such a large scale that the interior of a normally white porcelain toilet bowl is rendered an entirely different color, typically brown

"Jim, where are you headed off to in such a hurry?"
"I don't think that oyster burrito agreed with me. I'm pretty sure it's gonna have me painting porcelain."