Smattoo

Writing or drawing on flesh with a crayon made from a frozen poo (Alaskan Pipeline).

After Brenda had butt-fumbled Martin with the Alaskan Pipeline she split the end and wrote her initials on his sweaty back as he wept with dirty shame.

"Oh what a lovely Smattoo you have." Said little Hongdu as he looked on from his secure box.

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smattoo parlour

A place where people can go to indulge in the dark art of artistic style poo smearing. Usually consisits of a couple of small empty rooms, an entrance hall with a freezer loaded with different styles of smattoo and a party hall for large groups.

Jake - Hey Dave, fancy a spring roll or some corn on the cob tonight, I heard theres a new smattoo parlour opened up downtown?
Dave - Sure Jake, do you think they'll mind if we bring our own cakes?
Jake - I dunno Dave but I heard they have a big menu anyway, I just cant wait to get my hands dirty.
Dave - Me and you both, just give me 5 minutes to get the dirt stains off my best shirt and we will head over for a good smudging.