Teleportation-through-time-ists

Are cult that believes in random time travel. Basically that everything happens at any given time, which is confusing, so I'll explain. For example, say you're walking down the street. According to this cult, future you is walking further down the street at the same time, and that anything in the past is constantly on loop. They also believe that people from both the past and future are being teleported to the present all the time, and it is their responsibility to find them. Their leader is the immortal embodiment of a toaster, and their symbols include spaghetti noodles, paper towels, and cheese graters.

The teleportation-through-time-ists are rapidly approaching me, hence with the intentions to capture me.