that's why your shoes raggedy

top 10 quotes before disaster

"that's why your shoes raggedy"
"that's why your mama dead"
*THUD*
"dead as hell"
"what shoes she got on" *THUD*
"what shoes she had on her casket?"
"that's why your granny ain't got no knees"
...

cream

wtf I just wanted to look up the definition for cream on urban dictionary but all I get is Wu-Tang clan references somebody help

C.R.E.A.M. by Wu-Tang Clan is really good,
too bad I can't cream at how good this song is
because I'm in school

811

the national call-before-you-dig number

aka the number you dial when you don't want to accidently dig into some underground pipes or circuits like a dumbass

Person 1: "Imma dig a 10 foot hole in my backyard to bury my collection of dead puppies"
Person 2: "but first you gotta call 811 so you don't strike electrical wiring underground"
Person 1: "nah fuck that, Imma shock my self

squid game

imagine playing childhood games with 456 players to win 45.6 billion won just to die

guy with a suit and tie: "do you wanna participate in the squid game?"
me: "fuck that shi-, i'd rather choke on three fat dicks"