School

People who fuck up your mental health and your sleep schedule then blame it on your phone

Kid: “I want to die, I have so much work and I’m getting no sleep”
School: “It’s because you always on your phone”

Soup

Water that is flavored as food

Bro 1: “Aye bro wanna go get some soup”
Bro 2: “I love me some tomato water”