mmmmm

Often used to express pleasure while eating food

Leroy: mmmmm
Barry: Good, huh?
Leroy: mmmmm
Barry: *Receives phone call* Oh my god! I’ll be right there! No! No! No! My wife was just in a car accident she doesn’t have a good chance...
Leroy: mmmmm
Barry: Good, huh?

One Wipe Tuesday

This is to be celebrated on the second Tuesday of every year. After taking a poop on this special day, you wipe your butt once, and only once. No exceptions. It doesn’t matter how large or smelly the poop is, you only wipe once.

Brett: Oh my god! Why do you smell like shit?!
Cameron: It’s one wipe Tuesday! Don’t tell me you’ve been wiping more than once!

Common decency

Something your boring roommate says to you when he doesn’t want to hear your bangers at 11:00 am on the day of the only darty that he will ever have the pleasure to enjoy.

“There’s a thing called common decency, and I don’t want to hear your music at 11:00 in the morning because I’m lame. Hee hee.”