Accordionated

Being able to drive and refold a road map at the same time

Dave's a multi-tasker; he accordionated without crashing into the guardrail.

Asphinxiation

Being sick to death of unanswerable puzzles or riddles

Since they don't have the crossword puzzle hot line anymore, these riddles have caused me severe asphinxiation.

full admiral

when a man rams his penis into a woman's anus so hard, his balls also enter the anus. best executed when shouting "HUZZAH!" shortly thereafter.

woman-harder! Harder!...wait...OW!!!

man-HUZZAH! The full admiral has arrived!

Blogish

A variety of English that uses a large number of initialisms, frequently used on blogs

His note on Facebook would be better if he didn't use so many LMAO and other blogish.