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afterwork blast

The act of getting home from a long day of work and fucking your wife right after with your clothes on and your dick ripping out your pants. And your shoes on too.

Hey gurl Im home wanna fuck
Oh yes daddy yessssss

Oh yeah baby givvvv me an afterwork blast *moan*

by ☆★Midas★☆ January 19, 2022


Snore-addicted

A dumb fatass who snores so loudly, it sounds like a category 10,000 hurricane from 2 rooms away, aka you could use "my dad".

Guy 1: bro i'm tryin to sleep here! What's up with your fucking dad!?
Guy 2-3: Dude cover your ears he's boutta go super sayin! Hes snore-addicted!

by ☆★Midas★☆ January 10, 2022


🏳️ 🌈

A sin, unless you are a femboy.

I’m gay lol. 🖕🐵🏳️ 🌈
Me: SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GET AWAY FROM ME!!!
Gayass: IM A FEMBOY THO!
Me: Welcome to the club you are fine then…

by ☆★Midas★☆ February 8, 2022

1👍 1👎


mario singing amogus drip

A viral video on the internet with 323k views, shocasing an edit of marios voice singing amogus.

Hello it's a me Maaaaa rio. It's a me aahuaayeee, Aaaahahaaahahahaaa!!!
Okie Dokie let's-a-go, Maaario. Soo long gay bowserrrr eee, Aaaahaahahahahaaa.
Me: Bro check out "Mario singing Amogus drip 10 hour loop."

Rahmõnd: Why don't you stop listening to amogus drip and start getting some fucking bitches to drink some pussy drip.

Me: Motherfucking... The chances of me killing you are low.. but never zero

Rahmond The Racist: Yeah?

Me: Unlike your adoption certificate.

Rahmõnd: Oh noooooooooo
Rahmond

Raymond: Thank you I'm not a beaner anymore.

by ☆★Midas★☆ February 2, 2022


ambatublo

When you’re about to blow but it’s too close and you need to announce it quickly so you yell “ambatublo”

Girl: oh yeah *slurp slip sleeurp slap smack slurpity slep slurp*
Ronald: I’m about t- t- t-, ambatublo bitch wait oh no watch out!
Girl: *covered in white sludge*

by ☆★Midas★☆ February 21, 2024


February 24

National Ruin that ass day.
Stick something BIG up your ass...

Tyler: Hmmm... Joe what should I do?
Joe: Try sticking a hairbrush up your arsehole!
Tyler: Why?
Joe: Cuz' it's February 24th!

by ☆★Midas★☆ February 25, 2022

2👍 1👎


Wanna see my willy?

Something a little sqeaker will tell you when he thinks he's gone through puberty but his dick is only big because all his brain cells are stuck there.

Timmy: Wanna see my willy?
Koit(youtuber): Eww no, I'll make a new winky song about it.

by ☆★Midas★☆ January 20, 2022