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Philodendron (n)
A viney green plant with heart-shaped leaves that tends to wander for miles. Often found in concrete pots decorating bars and pubs . Be careful not to get caught up and Tangled into those Vines, they will strangle the life out of you.
Philodendron as a growth native to Italy and it is grown in very shallow dirt. If you attempt to put this plant in deep healthy soil, it can't adjust to a sunny environment. Be chure to leave a very loud war movie or presidential debate playing on TV. The philodendron doesn't thrive well in peaceful situations.
Don't be fooled by the heart shaped leaves ; this plant wards off any type of nurturing, and it's best just to leave it alone in some dark corner of your house.
Betty: "I just love your philodendron!"
Me: "I thought you had your OWN plant?"
Diane: "I bit your philodendron plant. It tastes like chocolate."
Mary Ann: " I wish I had your philodendron! It's awesome!"
Love | often confused w Love Ain't
Due to the nature in which love flourishes, it is often compared to plantlife. Love is not a Strangling Vine or philodendron, however it'll grow steadily & deeply if nurtured & properly cared for. Neglected love wilts & fades, similar to the lawn in your back yard. If the lawn looks greener on the other side of the fence, remember y'own lawn was just as vibrant once (but you watered the neighboring gr-ass). See: Rose colored glasses . Also keep in mind, you built the fence yourself.
Love can't be trimmed, cut back or, shaped into what you think (s/he) should be. If you lie, cheat, ignore, shut out, put down, insult, degrade, criticize, constantly fight, see only their faults, flaws & imperfections .... that? Love ain't.
Love requires warmth, positive/supportive & environment. Shallow dirt is not a proper habitat for love to prosper; after 7 years, love's roots still won't connect.
Suck the soul out of love & it will surely die a natural death.
As with plant species, love goes by many names. It's besth to Google a certain plant to find a blethora of aliases. True origins are often unknown. Ie: Venus flytrap is said to be native to Planet of the Apes, doubtfully a sincer8 planet considering the dense population of greedy cheetahs.
Shirley "I fkn love Antonio's guts. From the depths of my soul, to my fingertips. I can't explain it. He can put me down, criticize me, call me names, stand me up, tell me what to wear and not to wear, embarrass me in front of my friends, accuse me of things I'm not even capable of doing .... But at the end of the day I will always love him."
LOVE AIN'T -
Betty : " I love how we get so drunk together & don't even remember how we got home"
Ruby: "I just love this pizza! It's so spicy. '
Phyllis: what are you f****** insane? You're a f****** idiot! I told you what to say! I even told you how to say it? You must be an imbecile ... I bet you can't even call Uber."
Mrs. Folgers: "I love the way I tell him my body is beautiful then buys my drinks."
4👍 5👎
A portable, handheld 'communication' device (also called a cell phone) - although it is rarely used to actually communicate.
Most commonly used for: texting, sexting, social media posts, check the time, taking selfies or other pics of interest, check the temperature, get directions, track your significant other, write yourself a reminder, check your email, flashlight to get your carrkey in the hole, look up word meanings ie Urban dictionary, see your bank balance, transfer a few bucks to your friend for t
paying your bar tab, ordering UberEats delivery, summoning a Lyft ride, personal calendar, playing games such as Candy Crush while waiting for your friend to pump gas, shopping at Amazon, eBay,Wish, etc....
Jones: "1 checked my mobile device, he's foty minutes late"
Jones' girl: "yeah, he's on Hammer Time.
Betty: "wya?"
Bill: "IDK - I better GPS datshit on my mobile device."
Girl 1: "are you seriously taking a pic of that blank wall with your mobile device?"
Girl 2: "no, hehehe. It's a selfie shot"
(Girl 3 jumps in and photo bombs)
A portable, handheld mobile device called a celluar phone - although it is rarely used as an actual phone to make/receive calls
Common uses: texting, sexting, social media posts, check the time, taking selfies or other pics of interest, check the temperature, get directions, track your significant other, write yourself a reminder, check your email, flashlight to get your doorkey in the hole, look up word meanings ie Urban dictionary, see your bank balance, transfer a few bucks to your friend for the dutch treat Pizza, ordering Domino's delivery, summoning an Uber ride, personal calendar, playing games such as Candy Crush while waiting for your friend to pump gas, shopping at Amazon, eBay, wish, etc....
Guy: "do you know what time it is?"
Girl: "check your cell phone, yo"
Betty: "where is your girlfriend tonight?"
Bill: "I don't know, let me check my GPS tracker on my cell phone."
Girl 1: "are you seriously taking a pic of that blank wall with your cell phone?"
Girl 2: "no, haha. It's a selfie."
(Girl 3 quickly photo bombs)