Bieber Fever

An extremely deadly STD or fever. Early forms started showing up in Stratford, Ontario Canada(mid 1993) after a woman by the name Patricia Lynn Mallette allegedly had sexual intercourse with a mentally retarded chimp and produced a high pitched, homosexual, mentally retarded son, known as Justin Bieber. Patricia is known worldwide for creating the disease and there had been many assassination attempts on her after numerous VHS tapes that had videos of her having sex with the chimp. The disease has notably started on March 1st, 1994 but it was a small concern after not many had symptoms. However on January 15th, 2007 a small spike of the disease had started in parts of the US and Canada. Between then and July 2011, over 500 million cases had been reported, all from girls between the ages of 3 and 100 and some rare cases from gay males, with parents becoming extremely terrified of their daughters actions and resorted to murdering them, locking them in a room or closet, throwing them out on the street, selling them or basically doing anything to get rid of the girl to prevent the spread of the disease. As of now, there are no cures. There is no hope for humanity. All we can do is blame that one Canadian woman and the child she produced with the chimp.

Parent - Oh my God, please help my pre-pubescent daughter! She has Bieber fever.

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