Sink Canoe

When you need to take a shit really bad, and the toilet isn’t available, so you use the next best option and use the sink.

Me: “Hey man did you see the toilet was out of order”

Friend: “Yeah! I couldn’t wait so I dropped a sink canoe”

7👍 1👎

interstate monkey shit

When you are on a long car ride, there are no gas stations near by, and the guy behind you is tailgating you. You shit in your hand and fling it as hard as you can at their windshield.

Friend 1: Hey look that asshole is tailgating you.

Me: hold on give a sec

**takes dump in hand and throws shit at car**

Friend 2: whoa man you just took an interstate monkey shit

Friend 1: The splatter on that one was insane! He will be cleaning and smelling that for days.

Me: I practiced while I took sink canoes