Harry Potter

Lil' emo boy with a magic stick,which he waves around and says "Crucio!" alot.
This poor lil' emo boy,his parents are dead,his shmexy God Father Sirius is dead and to make things worse his best friend is a ginger.
By now you think he'd be a junkie with a bad crack habit but,curiously,he is still a straight lil emo boy who is yet to get laid.
Honestly Harry,do you want me to force feed you the viagra?
In conclusion,Harry Potter is a poor lil emo boy with an awful haircut and homosexual yearnings. The End.

~In cinema~
"Oh My God....mullet ville!"

Harry Potter is teh ghey,yo.

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TRL

Possibly the WORST TV show ever made.
Bad enough they have awful artists on the show (see:Lindsay Lohan) but they now have half-decent bands such as Green Day on. Urghh.
All that happens is they bring on some shitty celebrity, everyone in the audience (made up of losers,camp gay guys and teenie-boppers) screams at every word they say and I lose the will to live. And they play 20 seconds of each song.

TRL:
DickHeadPresenter: "So,Lindsay Lohan,how are you?"
LindsayLohan:"Well...actually my cat just died of cancer."
Audience: *cheers and whistles*
DickHeadPresenter: "UhHuh.And...what did you have for breakfast?"
LindsayLohan: "First I had a glass of orange juice...."
Audience: *cheers and whistles*
LindsayLohan:"...Then some toast...."
Audience: *cheers and whistles*
LindsayLohan:"....then I threw it all up again."
Audience: *cheers and whistles*

TRL:
Me: "WTF? Why the FUCKING hell are My Chemical Romance on TRL??!?!?!!?"
Me: *burns all MCR CDs*
Me: *kills self*

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christmas eve

Christmas Eve each year a fat man dressed in red (possibly to hide the blood) rides around on a "magical flying sleigh" led by drunk reindeers with names like Prancer (Yes:teh ghey),breaks into your home,steals your cookies and leaves crappy gifts that last till Boxing Day.
This criminal is thought to be armed and dangerous and has many doubles around the world that molest children that sit on their laps in malls.
He also has an army of evil munchkins who make crappy toys and kick people in their shins. They have also be known to partake in orgies.
If you approach him,he'll most likely yell "ho,ho,ho!" and shoot you with his laser gun.
Be afraid children,be very afraid.

Despite his name being chillingly close to Satan,Santa claims he is commiting all these henious on Christmas Eve crimes in the name of Jesus.
So we must conclude that not only is Santa evil,but so is Jesus. Amen.

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kenan and kel

A HUGE part of my childhood.
Along with The Simpsons (when it was still mildly funny),that cartoon about the shrimpy thingies that live under the sea with lil' tooty things on their heads and not forgetting the *wondrous* Little Bear Stories.
I loved it at age 8-10,now I just think it's creepy....

Kenan and Kel,a comedy American show about *ZANY!!!* black teenagers.One of them had a prominent addiction to orange soda,the other was a fat nark with NO chance of getting laid....OH MY GOD! It was racist!!!!

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Jesus Freak

Off-set of Christianity which brings shame to real Christians. The emos of religion if you will.
Crazy people who take the already fucked up laws of Christinaity to the extreme. They like Hell Houses,throwing holy water all over the place and George Bush. Oh,and Mel Gibson.
Jesus Freaks fear/loathe two thing: Slayer and Bill Hicks.

The Jesus Freak took her nine year old to see The Passion Of The Christ,then later that day she went to a rally to get Brokeback Mountain banned from cinemas.

Me: "Hey,why did Jesus walk on water?"
JesusFreak: "Well-"
Me:"Everyone knows, SHIT FLOATS!"
Me ~runs like hell~

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Avril Lavigne

Female singer who is spitting all over the word "punk".
Says she isn't trying to be punk,but obviously is by adhering to the mainstreams' idea of what punk is.
(Ie:neckties, "s8er bois" ,Green Day)
Loved by dumb teen/pre-teens who need to get some Hole, Bikini Kill and Le Tigre down their throats.
Plays *punk* music,without the politics,anger,meaning or ideals....yeah,baiscially punk without the punk.
Somebody should shoot that bitch. Prefferably John Lydon.

Dumb"rebel"Bitch: "Oh wow Avril Lavigne is sooooo KEWL. Punk Rock! I mean I can totally realate to her songs,having as many problems as I do! *sniff* My Mommy wouldn't even buy those chucks I saw Billie Joe from Green Day wearing! Oh,BTW,you're not punk...you're not wearing a necktie"
Me:"Kill me."

HOT TOPIC IS NOT PUNK ROCK.

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lmbfao

LMBFAO can mean one of two things:
1.Laughing My Big Fucking Ass Off.
2.Laughing My Butt Fucking Ass Off.
Both are very odd things to say.
They cause confusion among many.

PersonA: Yeah,so I saw Brokeback Mountain...
PersonB:LMBFAO
PersonA:*wonders if personB is fat or gay*
PersonA:*wonders which is worse*

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